3 Common Money Issues in Marriage (and How to Resolve Them!)

1. Different Spending and Saving Habits

It’s common for one partner to be a saver and the other a spender. While this can balance out in some cases, it often leads to disagreements if one feels the other is either too frivolous or too frugal. Over time, these contrasting habits can erode trust and cause resentment, especially if finances become tight.

How to Resolve It:

• Set Shared Goals: Start by discussing your long-term goals as a couple, such as buying a house, going on vacations, or planning for retirement. This can create a shared purpose for both partners to work towards.
• Create a Budget Together: Make a monthly or bi-monthly budget, allowing each partner some discretionary spending money within a set limit. This budget helps balance out personal freedom with joint financial responsibility.
• Agree on Splurges: If one partner enjoys spending more on certain items, agree on a reasonable amount for these “splurges.” This helps avoid feelings of restriction while still keeping spending in check.

2. Debt Management

Whether it’s student loans, credit card debt, or a car loan, debt can create stress in a marriage, especially if only one partner brings debt into the relationship. Arguments can arise if one partner feels burdened by debt they didn’t contribute to or if one is more eager to pay it off than the other.

How to Resolve It:

• Be Transparent About Debts: Lay all cards on the table about debts and discuss each person’s comfort level with tackling them. Honesty about the current financial situation can help create trust and understanding.
• Make a Debt Repayment Plan: Together, prioritize debts based on interest rates, balances, and other factors. This might include using strategies like the “snowball” or “avalanche” method. Working as a team helps ease the psychological burden.
• Celebrate Small Wins: Celebrate each milestone to keep motivation high. Paying down debt is a marathon, not a sprint, so find ways to reward yourselves when you reach each step along the way.

3. Power Struggles Over Financial Control

In some marriages, one partner might naturally take on more control over the finances. While this may work for some couples, it can sometimes lead to a power imbalance or feelings of resentment. If one person feels shut out of decisions or uncertain about finances, it can create tension.

How to Resolve It:

• Establish Joint Financial Meetings: Set aside time each month to review finances together. This promotes transparency and ensures both partners are aware of where money is going.
• Share Responsibilities: Even if one partner handles the day-to-day finances, the other can take on certain tasks, like tracking expenses, reviewing bills, or planning for large expenses.
• Maintain Individual Accounts (If Needed): Some couples find that maintaining separate accounts for personal spending can help reduce power struggles. This allows both partners to have a sense of autonomy while maintaining joint finances for shared expenses.